The Grieving Process

The Grieving Process

Every person is unique in the way he or she handles the loss of a loved one. While the grieving process is different for each of us, we all experience some common feelings as we work toward healing from our loss.

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Stage 1

Denial

While in the denial phase, it's easy to let naive beliefs about the situation's truth take over. Ignoring the catastrophe and putting your concerns aside is normal and even helpful when grieving. With denial, you can only take in what you can manage right now. As time goes on, you start to see things for what they really are, and you start to heal. Your emotions start to bubble to the surface as the denial starts to melt away.

Stage 2

Anger

You may experience negative emotions like wrath and resentment at some point. Moving on to the second stage of grieving is what you've done. Whether it's yourself, God, the doctor, or even the deceased, you can't stop looking for someone or anything to blame for their abandonment. These thoughts and feelings are common when dealing with loss, so you should not feel alone if you experience them.

Group therapy session: A woman cries, wiping her face while others offer support; setting is a bright room.
Two hands clasped together, showing support and comfort; one hand in a beige sweater, the other in a blue denim lap.

Stage 3

Bargaining

At some point, you might start to feel bad about the person's passing. It keeps happening, and you keep telling yourself that you could have stopped it if you had tried. You could try to negotiate with God through prayer by asking for a compromise. You will only feel worse about yourself if you give in to the "if onlys" and hypothetical scenarios. Put yourself in the other person's shoes and try to see things from their perspective.

Stage 4

Depression

You may experience a time of profound inner emptiness. This is the condition of being depressed. If you're going through this stage, you might think the suffering will go on forever. Dealing with the difficult question of whether or not to continue living. Depression is the most typical way people deal with loss, and you need to know that. It would be quite unusual for someone to have no depression following the loss of a loved one. Despite the difficulty of comprehending the idea that a loved one would not be returning, you must remain resilient and move forward.

Group therapy session: A woman comforts a distressed man, hand on his shoulder. Several diverse individuals sit in a circle in a brightly lit room.
Person with a hat walks across a dry, flat field towards a sunset.

Stage 5

Acceptance

A common misunderstanding is that it is "absolutely fine" to accept the death of a loved one. The only way to truly accept the loss of a loved one is to face the new reality of their physical absence. You may feel compelled to return your life to how it was before they passed away, which can make this change all the more difficult. You may adjust to this new reality, discover peace in it, and learn to live anew through acceptance. Although it's normal to feel bad about letting go and moving on, remembering isn't part of healing. One way to remember a loved one is to make new friends and acquaintances. Do not rush the grieving process; it is an individual one and should be given space to develop as it must.